Quentin Whistleton-Thynne's Weather Page
Well strike me pink! What's all this bloody nonsense concerning global warming.
In my youth the working classes were always complaining that they didn't have enough coal to keep warm or were short of food. I was struck by their whingeing and decided to do something about it.
Therefore I started an industrial concern dedicated to the burning of all fossil fuels on the planet. Warm up the planet you see and make hypothermia obsolete.
Similarly my intended venture into GM crop concerns will be determined to eradicate world hunger by producing vegetables of such toxicity but with a splendid taste that any one who eats them will be dead within a year.
I calculate that the world population could be reduced by 60% in three years. All natural food would then be in plentiful supply for the wealthier survivors.
I sometimes wonder why governments can't see the logic of my plans.
Time and again they tell me the public won't buy it. But as I said they would only have to be poor enough to buy it once and there would be no public to worry about anymore.
There you go . Politicians know nothing do they.
Toodle Pip
Quentin Whistleton-Thynne (Col. rtd)
April 1st 2005
